Category: Humor

Humorous Thoughts of Heather Classen

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Patriot’s Day, why I love it here.

After this most difficult winter, we Bostonians have Patriot’s Day. Since mid-April is when we can finally step outside without suffering, here it comes, the celebration of Massachusetts’ contribution to the creation of the United States of America. So glad they waited to start the revolution ’til the weather got good.

You can’t swing a dead cat around these parts without hitting a Revolutionary War Reenactor.

But I have to say, my favorite thing about all these re-enactors is when you see people in historical clothing mixing in with modern-times. For example, my boyfriend has a photo of a minuteman carrying a leaf-blower, which he really needs to have online somehere.

Or like Ichabod Crane in Sleepy Hollow.

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Here I have this sneak-over-the-shoulder #selfie thing: Minutemen, in line for a port-a-potty.

MunroeTavernSelfie

Priceless. There should be a name for this mash-up of modern and 18th century, a hashtag, something.

so anyways

I had driven by Munroe Tavern, where the British set up their field hospital after that first night of the Revolutionary War, a hundred times. This time we finally stopped in. Here are some iPhone photos that I took. (Aram’s awesome photos  are here.)

Red coats getting ready for the battle re-enactment at Tower Park

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After the war President George Washington visited the Munroe family for tea, to thank them for all their troubles during this battle. The family saved everything he touched. He sat in that bigger chair in the middle, and the cup he used is in a display case nearby. Gotta love the love people had for the pertinence of these items.

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I would be remiss if I didn’t post a photo of the flax spinning wheel. Making linen from flax was important in the avoidance of buying British cotton goods in the 18th century.

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Inside the Munroe Tavern.

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And here are the lobster-backs getting ready for their part of the re-enactment on the front lawn of the tavern. This Tower Park battle today (Saturday) actually took place after the famous battle of Lexington Green (Monday), they just do it on this Saturday beforehand to get everything done in the weekend.

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So much fun nerdy stuff going on around here right now. Can’t miss it if you try, get out there and see some of it.

Thanks for reading and Nerd On – H

P.S. And if all this isn’t marvelous enough: we finish on Monday with the The Boston Marathon.

MarathonMile18

<3

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Ascii Santa – from 1994ish

Ascii Santa 1994 by Heather Classen

Drew this ascii art back in the 1900s.

Posted here as pre-formatted text, and as code… work with me wordpress.

    MERRY CHRISTMAS!              __ _ __ ___
          &                  _ __’.:;.:;.:;.:`
     HAPPY NEW YEAR!        _’.:;.:;.:;.:;.:;.:`
                           ‘.:. , :`,.,`;’/`__ _` _
                          ‘..:;.;’.:,.;.:;      (_)
                        -__ –_-_-_-__—_-)
                       (                    )
    ____               (_- -__-_-__-____-__-)
   /#### /            |  ,~~~’  `~~~.   %@
   |######|             )  ><@>  <@><    %@%
   |#######|            /      /          %@p       
    ######|            ( *   (_c)   * )  % %      .vvvvvvvv.
     |#####|             ‘%@%@%@%@`, %@%@       .vvvvvvvvvv.
     /#####         _ _ d%@ `—-‘ @%@%@ _ _ _.vvvvvvvvvvvvv.
     ~~~~~~~       ‘:;.;%@@%@%@%@%@%@@%p  /.:;.:;vvvvvvvvvvvvvvv.
      `.:;.’     ‘:;.;%@@%@%@@%@%@%@%@ :: ____vvmvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv.
      :.:;.:`   ‘:;.:d%@%@%@%@%@%@@%@%.:;/####/.:;mvvvvvvvvvvvv
      :.:;.:;` ‘;.;;.%@%@@%@%@@%@%@%@p.:;|######|.:;mvvvvvvvvvvvv. 
      :.:;.:;./;.;;.;%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@ ::.’######|.:;mnvvvvvvvvvvvv
      :.:;.:;.|:.;.;.% %@%@%@%@%@% % :  mvv#####|.:;.mnvvvvvvvvvvv
      :.:;.:;/:;.;.:;.q%@%@@%@%@ %p.:;vv%mv|#####.:;.mnvvvvvvvvvv
      :.:;.:;|:;.:;.;;;%@%@@% %.:;.:;.vmnv. ~~~~~~ .:;.|mvvvvvvvvvv.
      :.:;.:/.:;.:;.:;.: o  .:;.:;.:;.vv.:;/.:;.:;.:;.|mnvvvvvvvvv.
       `.:;.|:;.:;;;.:;.    .:;;;;;;;;;;;;;|.:;.:;..:;mnvvvvvvvv.
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           ;.:;;.:;;.:     :;;;.:;.:;.:;.:;.:;.:;.:;.:;|mnvvvnm.
           :::;.:;.:;. o  ..:;.:;.:;;;;.;;;;.:;.:;.:;.:|mnvvnm.
           :::;.:;;.:     .:;;;;;;;;.:;.:;;;|.:;.:;.:;./mmvnm.
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           :.:;;;.;;;     .:;;.:;.:;;.:;.:;.:;.;.:;;;;`mmnn
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            ‘::;;;.;; o  :;;;.:;.:;;.;;;;;;;;;;;.:;.:`  H.Classen 
   MERRY CHRISTMAS!              __ _ __ ___
         &                  _ __’.:;.:;.:;.:`
    HAPPY NEW YEAR!        _’.:;.:;.:;.:;.:;.:`
                          ‘.:. , :`,.,`;’/`__ _` _
                         ‘..:;.;’.:,.;.:;      (_)
                       -__ –_-_-_-__—_-)
                      (                    )
   ____               (_- -__-_-__-____-__-)
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  |######|             )  ><@>  <@><    %@%
  |#######|            /      /          %@p       
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    |#####|             ‘%@%@%@%@`, %@%@       .vvvvvvvvvv.
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    ~~~~~~~       ‘:;.;%@@%@%@%@%@%@@%p  /.:;.:;vvvvvvvvvvvvvvv.
     `.:;.’     ‘:;.;%@@%@%@@%@%@%@%@ :: ____vvmvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv.
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     :.:;.:;/:;.;.:;.q%@%@@%@%@ %p.:;vv%mv|#####.:;.mnvvvvvvvvvv
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            #######HHOHHH###########################
           ‘::;;;.;; o  :;;;.:;.:;;.;;;;;;;;;;;.:;.:`  H.Classen
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“Crap, I Got Governor”

Here’s the basic problem with politics: anyone that actually wants to be a politician is exactly the kind of person you do not want in charge … of anything. Simply put, wanting to be a politician should disqualify you from being one.

From both sides of the fence, liberals and conservatives, who would want to go through all the baloney a person has to go through to get themselves elected? Clearly a person would have to be mental … or a narcissist, as evident in 95% of our political offices.

So here’s my solution: we get people for political office the same way we get people for jury duty.

For each office we get a random sample of the electorate, maybe twenty or forty people, send them summons for the office they qualify for, and they have to report for candidacy. It will hark back to the days when holding a public office was considered a civic duty, and not power trip it has become. Yeah, some people would try to get out of it, but there would definitely be some worthy players who never would have gotten the chance otherwise.

The media would love it, “Summons Day” would be like a carnival for them, running all over the voting districts trying to have the first interviews with the people selected to show up for duty. The voters would be able to vote from a complete cross section of society, for better or worse. We’d have debates between opinionated old women and their frat boy opponents. The people in charge would be as diverse as the constituents. And I’m talking about every office, from mayor, to state representatives, senators, even the president – ten randoms from every state, we could find a good candidate out of that pool of 500. Could it really be any worse than what we have now? Every term we would have a fresh new batch of public servants ruling out cronyism. And most importantly, people would be interested in politics, because it might actually effect them personally.

Imagine that one day, heading out to your mailbox, finding the red, white, and blue computer printed summons, opening it up…”Crap, I got governor”.

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“Joke” from Behind the Iron Curtain

Here’s a joke I heard during the communist summer of 1989 in Slovakia.

Three girls are in heaven, an American, a Slovak, and a Russian. They ask each other how they ended up there.
The American girl says that she wanted a car, so her family saved up for a year. Her father bought the car for her and then she went out and crashed it.
The Slovakian girl wanted a motor scooter, so her family saved up for a year. After a year her father went and bought her the scooter, and then she went out and crashed it.
The Russian girl wanted a bicycle, so her family saved up for a year, and she starved to death.

Yep.